Gather Your Allies
Most of us attribute a certain 'magic' to the new year, though in truth, one day just moves into the next. We see it as a time of renewal of purpose and intention. We re-evaluate our lives, much as we used to measure our height on the jamb of a door - and put our mark on the timeline of our lives.
Most of us have moved through the years holding an image of the direction we thought or hoped our lives would take, and often at this time of year, we check our compass, make course corrections and, until life intervenes again, we dream into the next phase. We become what we reach for, grow toward, so this is a good thing.
Any time we embark on a new (or repurposed) goal, it is important to gather our allies. Some of them may be obvious to us - the 'visible' ones - friends, colleagues, trusted sources of information. We draw them near, gird our loins for battle and sally forth. However, I would like to suggest that we also have as allies some of the things we try to hide or position ourselves as far from as possible in our lives...our traumas and embarrassments.
Arnold Mindell, a transpersonal psychologist who called our body's symptoms 'dreams trying to come true', suggested that people should make allies of their symptoms and traumas. They have a lot to teach us and have often created resiliency and wisdom in us that we can call on in times of challenge.
Things that we have been trying to move away from, symptoms, traumas of our earlier life, places in our selves that we feel 'deficient' or not good enough - these can become our allies if we allow them to stand in the light and teach us. For instance, being ostracized as a child might develop into an ability to stand strongly against the tide of peer or societal pressure. The trauma of a loss might grow empathy in us, or a physical limitation, strength.
Bringing these into the light and standing next to them allows them to breathe as well. They are no longer hiding in the shadows sucking our energy...they are standing next to us as resources, both drawing strength from us for their healing, as we draw strength from them.
A short exercise you can do with your journal:
Identify something in yourself that you feel ashamed of or traumatized by. Hold it clearly in your mind.
· Where in your body do you feel this?
· Is there any part of this thing or experience that you feel has created something positive in your life?
· What have you gained or grown toward from this original embarrassment or trauma?
Imagine it, and the tools it has brought you, standing next to you, walking forward toward your goals. Keep it with you, in sight. Own it. Bring it out of the shadows and into the light of a new year.
